Returning to Therapy: What I Learned About Finding the Right Therapist
Returning to Therapy After 15 Years
Last year, I returned to therapy. The last time I sat in that chair was more than 15 years ago.
Of course, the decision to return to therapy, finding a therapist, and then settling into the process all felt scary. It reminded me of what my own clients experience and of what so many people go through when they take the first steps toward getting help.
Why the Start of the Year Can Stir Something Up
January and February are popular months to begin stock-taking to see what is working, what is wearing us down, and what we might want to change. It is also a powerful and vulnerable way to begin the new year.
What Brought Me Back
Personally, a few things nudged me back to therapy: a significant life transition, painful tensions with some people whom I love and who are important to me, and a growing sense that my stress was no longer something I could “manage” by myself. I needed support to understand what I was experiencing. I also wanted to problem-solve and heal.
Common Signs It Might Be Time for Support
People seek therapy for many reasons. Some common signs it may be time to reach out include:
Carrying stress for a prolonged period
Feeling stuck in the same patterns
Low mood that lasts for weeks or months
Frequent anxiety or panic attacks
Relationship strain or feeling disconnected from others
Noticing your overall well-being is slipping
This list is not exhaustive, but if any of it resonates, you are not alone, or weak for needing support.
Choosing a Therapist and Why I Chose EMDR
Several factors influenced my choice of a therapist. These factors included wanting to experience fast relief for some of the distress I was experiencing and recognising that some of my current struggles might be related to my own history.
Because of these considerations, I ultimately chose an EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) therapist.
Therapy Has Grown
Over the last twenty years, the Caribbean’s pool of mental health professionals has grown significantly. It includes clinical social workers, couple and family therapists, psychologists, counsellors, occupational therapists, psychiatrists, art and creative therapists, and pastoral counsellors. People can access these services in their territory through government agencies, community-based and non-profit organisations, and private practices. Many providers are listed online.
Fit Matters: How to Start Looking
Because fit, trust, and the therapeutic relationship matter, it is often worth calling a few providers to speak briefly and get a sense of who feels like a good match. Most providers offer a free brief consultation to assess needs and determine whether there is a good fit. In a small community, it can also help to ask trusted family, friends, or colleagues for recommendations.
Questions to Ask in a Consultation
When contacting a potential clinician, consider questions about training (most independent practitioners have at least a master’s degree plus a supervised internship experience), specialist skills (for example, experience with depression, anxiety, drug or alcohol misuse, or couple and family concerns), and their therapeutic framework and view of how change happens (such as systemic/relational, narrative, EMDR, solution-focused, emotionally focused, or CBT). Finally, clarify practical details such as how often sessions occur, typical session length, whether family members can attend, and what a typical course of treatment might look like.
The First Session: Anxiety, Risk, and Trust
Settling back into therapy took time for me. I was very anxious during the first session. What helped me was remembering that my jitters made sense, since I was taking a risk by talking about personal matters with a stranger. I also reminded myself that it would take time to trust this person. What also helped was the warmth and lack of judgment I experienced from my therapist.
“Vibing” and Feeling Safe
When finding a therapist, several factors should be considered to ensure a good fit. It is important to experience your therapist as being non-judgmental. As some of the young people I see describe it, it is also important to feel you and your therapist are “vibing.” Which means experiencing comfort and being accepted.
If It Doesn’t Feel Right, Say So
Impressions are essential when we have made an appointment and met with a professional. If you do not feel comfortable, it is vital to say so and speak about what you need. Ultimately, therapy is a collaborative process, and most professionals are very aware of the importance of client feedback in developing a treatment plan. If it feels like they are not considering your concerns or listening to your needs, it will be essential to find another professional who can meet those needs.
One Brave Step, Then Another
Returning to therapy reminded me that changing often begins with one brave step and a realisation that I needed to stop managing everything alone. For me, therapy was not about “fixing” myself; it was about making sense of what I was living through, getting relief from distress, and understanding the deeper patterns that may have shaped how I cope and connect. I was anxious at the start, and that anxiety made sense. Trust takes time, and therapy is a relationship. What helped most was being met with warmth, respect, and no judgment.
Mental health support is for anyone who feels worn down, stuck, or aware that their usual strategies no longer suffice. There are more therapy options in the Caribbean than many people realise, and finding a good fit is part of the process. Ask questions and pay attention to how you feel as you engage in the process. Speak up about what you need. And if it is not the right match, keep looking. The right therapeutic relationship can become a place to heal, to find your footing again, and to move forward with a clearer path.
A Small Next Step
If you are considering therapy this year, start with one small step: reach out to a few clinicians and book a brief consultation. Ask about their training, approach, and experience with what you are facing, and pay attention to whether you feel safe and understood.
Quick FAQ: Therapy in THE CARIBBEAN and Finding the Right Therapist
How do I choose a therapist in the Caribbean?
Start by identifying what you need (stress, anxiety, trauma, relationship concerns), then speak to a few providers. Ask about qualifications, approach, and practical details, and pay attention to whether you feel safe and understood.
Do I need to feel comfortable in the first session?
Some nerves are normal. What matters is whether you feel warmth, respect, and a sense that the therapist is listening without judging you.
What should I ask during a free consultation?
Ask about training, experience with your concern, therapeutic approach, session length and frequency, fees, confidentiality, and what progress typically looks like.
What if it’s not a good fit?
You can say so directly. If the fit does not improve, it is reasonable, and often wise, to try another clinician.
What is EMDR used for?
EMDR is commonly used to help people process distressing or traumatic experiences and is also used by some clinicians for anxiety and other symptoms connected to difficult life events.
